I have never questioned why my soul picked you to be my father. It is a truth that I know as deeply as I know myself. You have held safe, non-judgmental space for me to be exactly who I am, and now, as a parent myself, I understand just what a task and a gift that is. You create the structure for me to learn, grow, and heal in. You allowed me to make mistakes and were there to catch me when I dealt with the consequences of my actions. You never judged me, you simply loved me through everything that I have ever battled.
It would have been easy to meet me with control because I move through the world with the energy of the south. The energy of passion, the energy of fire, the energy of a wild horse unwilling to be tamed. You never tried to control me, you simply created the structure for me to be exactly who I am and honored that authentic expression of me.
You love me unconditionally in a way that I wish the whole world got to experience. I never question your love and your support, not once. You loved me just as deeply when I was struggling as when I was thriving. You loved me when I was messy and thrashing at life, and you loved me when I was flourishing and blooming. You have loved all expressions of me, no matter how many times I recreated myself and what I wanted out of this human experience.
I don’t want to imagine a life without you in it, but I know that someday that will happen too. But today is not that day, and I hope that tomorrow is not either. I always explain divine masculine energy as the structure that allows the feminine to flow, the water bottle that allows the water to flow within it. Someday, you won’t be my water bottle, but I hope that when that day comes, I will have learned how to hold that water bottle for myself. I will have learned from the best water bottle teacher who I ever could have met. When the universe made you, you were made perfectly to love and parent me. In moments when I question what the universe is doing, I remember that if the universe gave me you as my father, it must know exactly what it is doing.
You taught me what it looks like to be truly loved by a man, and in moments where I have picked partners who didn’t know how to love me, I was able to remember how you have. I was able to remember that I was worthy of a man who holds structure, safety, protection and honors who I am and who I am becoming. I wouldn’t be me if it wasn’t for you, and I will be forever grateful that you are who you are so that I can be who I am.
I love you, Dad, and I am so grateful for the way that you have loved and honored me as your daughter!
Xoxox
Your daughter